Deep breaths now. Inhale and exhale.

Today is a wierd day.
A very wierd one indeed.

LMC aka Chinese Bitch actually likes my presentation! Like no way! :o

See, one of my team member was missing on the day of presentation, like always, so my group has to wrap up the whole deal with me and another also-not-so-consistant member. Our presentation was on some dumb story in some dumb textbook so basically, we rip the whole passage out and copy+paste it as our answer.

Well, that's what we thought since the missing member AKA Soaring Sky goes AWOL again, so we decided to cut out his part. You wonder: Didn't the teacher notice?

Nope, she's a muddlehead! I bet she won't even notice a nuclear bomb dropping beside she until she's fried. But let's not digress further, so in short she likes our presentation, surprisngly, and she almost wanted to give us fullmark till some dickhead critize us of 'not being co-operative'

His terms of 'not being co-operative' is because Soaring Sky didn't gave us a rain check before he fell sick. WHAT KIND OF DUMB REASON IS THAT?!
Look here Bastard Bin, my group are not gifted with the powers of premonition, so for the love of your own ego stop being such a dickhead!

On a happier note, i won't be seeing those dumbass in 3 more months. Joy!

Ritual of the dating game. Unrealistic version.

Guy & Girl: Hey you, you're the kind i like. Stop pretending, i know you like me so baby, don't hesitate. Let's play a game call L.O.V.E

Girl: I'd give you one minute, if you don't take action soon then you're a coward. Not even acting cool will help you.

Guy: Haha, baby you won't understand. That's what i want you to do, to be anxious. My dating skill is beyond your imagination.

Guy & Girl: Hey you, you're the kind i like. Stop pretending, i know you like me so baby, don't hesitate. We're playing a game call L.O.V.E... That's right.

Guy: Your eyes are not focused, you're acting indifferent. Soon you will be mine... i hope.

Girl: Seriously, can you pull this off? Only an idiot will play mind game. The level of stupidity i've seen is beyond your imagination.

Guy & Girl: Hey you, you're the kind i like. Stop pretending, i know you like me so baby, don't hesitate. We're playing a game call L.O.V.E, so please say you're happy cause i really dig you.

Guy: Haha... love is a crazy thing. It changed my heart into a loving machine, not even a pro can handle you. But i only have one question: Why do i like you?

Girl: You're so cute so why won't you come to me? Only a moron will play mind games.

Guy & Girl: Hey you, you're the kind i like. Stop pretending, i think i like you so baby, don't hesitate, let's play a game call L.O.V.E.

So baby please say "I do" cause i like you alot... i've liked you all along.

Sometimes, i really want to do this...

Bad day. Really bad day.

Got chided by the bloody chinese bitch, whom i still do not understand why she's still teaching when i've already taken the bloody O level chinese!

Basically, she chewed me out infront of the class then spit me out like some damn gum. And she demand i redo a report which she does not plan to mark. I mean what's the point of doing it if you don't plan on marking it anyway.

She also said she wants to break up my group (YAY!) but send us to other groups (WTF?!) because 'we lack chemistry when we work together'. Oh for God's sake, why are you still teaching when we could use the time to do more important sutff like Chemistry or Physic?!

Which reminds me, our physic teacher is really wierd. See, she has to ability to make nuclear energy sound boring, i mean IT'S NUCLEAR ENERGY! Any kid who has played ANY war games knows Nuclear energy is bloody interesting!

She makes nuclear energy sound like she's reading Advanced Maths 101. Totally boring. By the way did i mention she screams like nobody business too? I really fear for my eardrums. :(

Drop me a comment telling me how you pity me and exalt my name wants to help me by killing her. I'm ready to pay any price for a hitman to gun her down.

I swear, i'm so emo these days.

I've been looking back at my past few entries and i swear, i sound totalluy emo! I mean i did the whole Identity crisis thingy, had depressive thoughts and went on a major guilt trip.

Seriously, i cannot be any emo-er. Unless something bloody bad happens *touch wood* after which my last entry will prolly read as follow:

Dear mom and dad

I know you really love and i really love you, i do. Even though i rarely show it but i do feel that way deep down inside. I'm so sorry for leaving you so suddenly but i really can't take it anymore.

This life... it's suffocating me. I can't breath, i'm gasping for air in this stinking society. I've lost my dreams, my feelings, my faith in this world. I've fallen behind and can never catch up.

I've been rejected by this society and now i can't find what i've left behind and where it belongs. I lie in bed crying for hours, all broken broken inside. I know i'm not sleeping and all that's left of yesterday's pain, is my human shell. My soul craves of relief, my body craves for rest. Even though i must scarifice it, i am willing to do it.

This is the only way i can save myself. I'm so sorry. Take care.

Your Child.

P.S: I just failed my maths and I'm at the LAN shop. Where did you think i went?

Who am i?

I wish the wind was me, i wish the moon was me.
I wish the drifting flower was me.

Playing all day long, without a care in the world.
Ignoring what the world might say about me.

I just wanna be the real me, living my life happily.
Drifting with the breezy wind.

Playing all day long, without a care in the world.
I shall enjoy it,
even if the wind blows or the rain pours.
Being the real me again.

I asked the other me, how do you want to live?
Drifting from conscious to sleep, what do you want?

The other me replied, amusingly.
Who am i, i am who, there's no reason to know.

Life's better this way.

东方不败: 风云再起!

For a dose of nostalgia, here's a song that's 13 years old!



Here's the part where 东方不败 AKA Asia The Invincible sings and live as a commoner for a short while. I remember seeing those a few months agao on channel 8 and it brought back lots of memories. The cheesy flying effect, the way they flip and be 'transported' to another place... those were the good time x)

-sigh-

I'm getting so old, i want to be 4 years old again. Without a care in the world and watch tv all day instead of homework.

If you want the song, there's the:

Chinese version: http://www.lyndgz.com/bumen/dianjiaozu/IMAGE/xiaohongchen.mp3

and

Cantonese version: http://www.yecd.com/music/bemyself.mp3

I'm sick and tired.

Bleah. So like i'd just type a few more words than call it an entry. How's that sounds? Good, no?

T'cha... you know what? -wags finger- Uh-un. I ain't gonna do some lameass entry and call it an entry. But you just, all i can see are just folios and homework.

Also Math's teacher's test was a brain killer. I mean really, i had to think for a few mins to get what is 30 divide by 6.

Pathetic huh?

There's a dark secret in me...

Don't leave me locked in your heart.
Set me free. Feel the need in me, set me free.
Stay forver and ever and ever....

Ok, that was the lyrics for my fav video for this week and no, i don't have any dark secrets. Even if i do, i won't be telling xD



I love the middle scene where she wears that VERY plunging neckline... umm thing. Ditto the hip thrusting too. Also, i like the whole 'Snake moving backwards' part, as i call it. T'was very cool. But you know what fasicates me the most? It's how she does the arm-flipping-then-folding part. o_0

I've tried doing it but i can't! If anyone knows hwo to do it, can you teach me? XD!

Sucks to be me.

I don't really have time to blog as my D&T folio still lies unfinished and calling commanding me finish it by 9/8/06. So here's a few pictures to let you intoxicate yourself over while letting me mask over the fact that this is not a standard entry. Just words and 3 pictures. D'oh!


ALVA, THE ENCHANTING DANCER IN THE MIST.

VIKING, CONQUEROR OF THE SEVEN SEAS.

LUCIA, BRINGS LIGHT TO THE DARKEST NIGHT.

Have i mention before that i Absolut-ely love Absolut's ads? Sorry, being very lame here. x(

Stupid coversation with a fellow schoolmate. Note that i'm not using 'friend'.

Christian friend AKA CF: Hey, are you free this saturday? Wanna come to my cellgroup?

Me: No, i'm busy with tution at 10(which is true) until 4(which is false).

CF: Nevermind, my group last till 6. Come lah, gimme your handphone number.

Me: I have no handphone nor do i wish to join.

CF: C'mon, it's be fun. I mean after i beleive in the Lord, i've changed for the better. See, when i think you now i think of, 'he's unique and he has his own reason not to play basketball cause the Lord has plans for everyone.

If i was the past CF, i think of 'Wha~ so tall don't play basketball so wasted' and that what you're doing is wrong.

Me (thinks): WTF do you mean by that?! What makes you so 'correct' ?! you f#%king @$$^&*%! KNNCCB! Why you little scumbag, asswipe, son of the... -abusive thoughts trails off-

Me (says): If you're trying to get me to go by saying that, i got news for you. It's not working and it's never going to work. ¬_¬"

My life sucks so like save me?

Oh god, i hate this kind of people. You know those that whine that their 'friends have no time for me' and 'this is so socially awkard so please give me solutions'. I have a lot of these kinds of friends.

See, they are all slightly friendless (don't be fooled by their long friend links) and they like to whine and whine about how people don't pay much attention to them and how 'friends are never there' and some other emo stuff.

For example:

I said: Well, eveyone got their own life to lead and it is a tad selfish to ask others to put their life on hold just to hear your problems.

am i really being selfish? i thought friends would lend you their listening ears, their shoulders to cry on, their arms for a nice warm hug, their sleeves for you to blow your mucus into when it starts flowing out. because, if my friend really needed someone to talk to, i know i'd try my best to listen.

Oh sheesh, everyone cries some point in their life. You just happen to cry more. So what, you want everyone to stop whatever they are doing to comfort you? Please, we can only do this so many times before you treat you little emotional problem as a daily occurence.

Next i said: If you would be a bit more trusting and less cynical, perhaps you can see the comfort you are looking for. The 2nd scene is just too familiar to me.

Trust people more? i've tried. but people abuse that trust. i'm tired of this deceit. less cynical? it flows in my blood, i guess.

Oh well, we can never break this endless cycle of emo-ness unless you try again and again and again, until you got your result. Don't be afraid of failing just because you've been hurt once. If i was like you, i'd be dead now. Really.

And the last thing i said: I think the most you can do it to avoid such situation and you'd be fine =/

let's see. by avoiding such situations, i must be an outcast/anti-social person (which i partly am already) AKA stop going out with anyone to prevent any conversations from taking place?

For goodness sake, i'm not telling you to cut off all ties with civilizations! If you don't feel like being in an awkward group where you are 'forcing a smile on your face, trying to fit in their conversations which you barely understand, simply because you dont hang out with them often. you ask them questions, they dont hear you. you try to speak but you keep getting interupted.' then don't do it lah~ Find a group where you truly belong and where they accept you for who you are.

So stop the bloody sulking and help youself. We can only help you if you help yourself and stop saying they don't care about you. I know because i fell into this spiral of doom.

You hope your friends will pay attention to you, so you create problems and surprise surprise they paid attention to you. But soon the attention wears off and you try the same trick over and over again. Eventually you friend will just brush off pathetic attempt to get their attentions as a stunt pulled by the attention-seeker.

Do you want to be labled at an attention-seeker? Don't think so.

Have you ever been alone in a crowded room?

I have,I have you breathing down my neck
Breathing down my neck.
I don't, don't know what you could possible expect under this condition.
So I'll wait. I'll wait for the ambulance to come, ambulance to come.
Pick us up off the floor
What did you possibly expect under this condition, so slow down.
This night's a perfect shade of

Dark blue, dark blue


Dark blue, dark blue
Have you ever been alone in a crowded room?
When I'm here with you, I said the world could be burning, burning down

Dark blue, dark blue.

Have you ever been alone in a crowded room?
Well I'm here with you, I said the world could be burning 'Til there's nothing but

Dark blue, dark blue.

If you've ever been alone you'll know Dark blue
If you've ever been alone, you'll know, you'll know...

Funny coversations with sexual innuendos.

Ok maybe i'm getting a wee bit dirty minded and it perverted the following innocent coversation into something more... perverted. Hey, it's oral examinations week (as if talking exams not the other kind) but it's rather funny if you think about it, especially if it comes from my teachers!

Teacher A: John, why did you come yesterday? I want to give you oral.

Student B: But 'cher, i did come yesterday. I saw you giving Anna and Mary oral so i come later.

Teacher A: Yes, i was giving Anna and Mary oral but couldn't you wait? They came early didn't they?

-----

Teacher B: So you guys have oral later. Remember to be polite to the teacher and give them your IC ah~

Student B: 'Cer, how many teachers will be at the oral?

Teacher B: 2

Student B: Wha~ must oral 2 teachers?! Die!

-----
Student C is a guy, just FYI.

Student C: Wah~ just now oral sure die one!

Me: Why?

Student C: Starting i go fast then i went slow because they (The words) were hard to swallow then when i started to go slow i stumble over the size of it (the words again). Then hor, after i finish reading it, the teacher's face was so black, like i came too fast.
-----

I swear, i think i'm the only one who think too deep into these coversations. Ah well, i guessed it's normal to think this way. It is oral week after all, where the teachers get oral-ed by hundreds of students everyday. xDDD!

7 Deadly Sins: Lust

This is my draft for the intro of Lust, one of the 7 deadly sins. She is literally, the sin call Lust. Though she does have a mortal name. So like, give feedback about this. Arigato ^^

Being the epithet of Lust isn't very easy. You have your career and bills to take care of. Not to mention of the dwindling cash account. Rinoa rolled around on her bed to face the open skies above her bedroom, exposed to her with the help from the slates of transparent glass. "What to do tonight, I’m so sick of clubbing…" Rinoa closed her toffee colored eyes and drifted into slumber land.

"My, aren’t you a beefy bachelor." She said as she walked over to the man standing in the middle of the grand hall. "Do you want me?" she whispered seductively as he gazed back at the pale moon with its sliver shafts of light falling across the balcony of the palace, illuminating the ancient being with its splashes of pure white. Then she woke up, staring at the starry urban night sky. “Just a dream… a fond but spurious dream…”

It may be strange but she had always dreamt about being homely. Getting a good guy, settling down, have a few kids, and she actually thought it will happen with that guy. But luckily (or should I say unfortunately?) they didn’t make it. Her friends thought it was just a phase she is going through. It does get lonely after a few thousand years, all the sins know that. The ones you loved dies while you lived on, untouched by the hands of time...

Rinoa sighed as she put the on a red satin dress with spaghetti straps and a pair of black sandals, an attire worthy of going clubbing and that’s what she will do. As she was about to walk out of the door, she looked at an old family photo of she and her family, all whom had passed away and a drawing of a formidable looking man with a strong set of jaws and sharp eyes and she touched the frame ever so lightly, as if it will crumble any moment.

It was ironic that she chose the bar 'Sins' to party tonight, nicely tucked away in a small corner. She chuckled at that little thought then proceed to enter the club. Only to stopped by the burly man in a tight black tee, aka the bouncer.

“Hey, you’re going to queue up like everyone else.” His husky voice projected and flexing his bicep. Rinoa looked at him quirkily, complete with the raised eyebrows. “Right.” She brushes up her hair. “My, with such a deep voice, you certainly sound like the owner of this club.” “Lady, I’m not the-” She cut him off before he could speak again. “Surely, you can make an exception for this tiny, helpless girl?” she laid her index finger on his chest and made little swirls.

And so, Lust made her way into the pub free, much to the annoyance of those outside. “Ah well, guess some creatures hold more privileges than others.” She chuckled as she chewed on a cherry as red as her lips.

Give comments and feedback!

Ok, no more Mr.Pushover!

In refrence to this incident, i've decide to change my stand. I am no longer going to feel guilty over this kind of incident EVER again. I told everything to that friend and he was a bit confused, so i advise him to ask the teacher about this matter and what happened next is really... -shakes fist-

He asked for a transfer back to my team and the teacher agreed! Apparently he couldn't take the hint to bugger off (Either he was think-skinned or oblivious or just couldn't care) and the only instinct he has is to attach himself back to me like a bloody leech!?

Now i wished i've done the snobby line, maybe he'd take that 'subtle' hint. Humph!

Seasons and Trees plus a moral dilemma.

By the way, i've been a hypocrite today. I told my teacher about my friend's laziness and she totally told him off. Then during recess he asked me what happened, i told him the teacher didn't wait for me to finish my sentences and jumped to conclusions on her own.

Yes, i feel so fake and bad and probably deserve to die. God, I'm such a hypocrite...




The summer rain that started to fall
gently streaked past my tears
Images that resemble memories
are just autumn's drama reruns.

Why have I suffered
Almost the same blows such countless times?
But even so, I'll probably fight again
That is one of life’s mysteries.

Falling in love, giving it everything
Hoping that this is the last heartbreak
Even the mango tree, swaying through time
Will eventually bear fruits.

Let go the tension in your shoulders
So you can leave the past behind you
From here they're probably not too far
The sceneries you haven’t even seen before

EDIT: I've decide to tell him the truth tomorrow. Even though it may ruin our friendship but... but I realized that I couldn't go one doing this forever. I'm also sorry that I can't help you this time, not because the teacher specified that you had to do it yourself, but because I think it's time for you to learn the cruel realities of life, that no one can save your ass forever.

If he don't want to be friends with me anymore, it's fine with me but he needs to remember that other people may not be so tolerant of him, and that he'll face this situation another day and it'll be even worse then unless i tackle it now.

Maneater - Nelly Furtado.

I must say she's gotten real fit and has got some nice meat on her instead of her skinny twig style, like when she first came out. So like here you go, my recommended video for this week. But be warned the video sucks big time but the music and beat is strangely, hypnotizing. She just can't do the whole sexy kitten thing.

Interesting conversation.

I was asking my friend if religion is good or bad. He said that that will depends on the teachings of the religion. But he admits some religion makes one forget critical thinking and believes everything their religion says, in particular -- although most likely, you believe in some pretty horrible things, like stoning adulterers or killing the children of your enemies or hating homosexuals or jews or not touching menstruating women or having as many babies as possible.

And if you don't it's probably only because you've decided which parts of God's word are good enough for you, and which parts aren't to be taken seriously, since they bother you personally, and that they can therefore be considered to have been mistakes on His part.

So he gives an example:

You: "Well, it looks like a dog and it barks."
Your Religion: "It's a cat."
You: "Are you sure? I think it's a dog."
Your Religion: "Do you want to burn for all eternity, smarty-pants?"
You: "Oh, right. It's a cat."

See?